An open letter to Toy Companies....

Dear CEO of Toy Companies and Toy Packaging Companies:

Well, another Christmas has come and gone, and another seven bags of garbage are being thrown out. Sadly, most of this garbage consists of cardboard packaging, plastic, and other assorted items used in packaging my children's toys.

Why oh why do you find it necessary to strap a toy into a box with those wonderful silver twist ties? Nothing says cheer and fun like hearing Mommy and Daddy swear because there are 17 silver beauties holding the toy in place. It gets even better when Mommy has to run and get a bandage because Daddy sliced his hand because he had to use scissors to cut through the silver beasts to get the toy out. And Christmas just wouldn't be the same without having anxious, over-sugared children waiting desperately for their toys to be pried out of jaws of those silver vice-grips.

I always knew that toy companies were in cahoots with battery companies (I mean come on, does it really take 6 double AA batteries to run a toy car?), but now I realize that you are also in collaboration with Home Depot and other hardware stores. Now there are actually tools that are specifically designed to get toys out of their plastic packing! What brilliance! What genius!! What a royal pain in the ass!!

I have to say though, my favourite part of the whole de-packaging fiasco was to find that my son's toy was actually screwed into a solid piece of plastic. Said piece of plastic was then twist-tied into the cardboard box, and said cardboard box.... you guessed it! It was totally encased with more plastic!! But then again, that toy can be shot to the moon and back and that sucker won't move a centimeter because of all that fantastic packaging.

The true irony of the situation is that when unpacking a toy for my 3 month old daughter, I had to cut through the ties. Nothing says choking hazard like lethal silver twist ties!

So thank you Mr or Ms CEO. Thank you for extending the time it takes to unwrap presents by a solid two hours because it takes at least that much time to pull the toys out of their packages. Thank you for destroying my children's innocence because they had to hear their parents swear to high heaven in frustration over these packages. Thank you for destroying the Earth by filling landfills with unneccessary packing material. And finally, thank you, thank you, thank you for creating choking hazards not with your toys, but with your packaging.

But hey - that's what Christmas is all about - right?